Appearances are deceptive

When I arrived at the hotel this morning looking rather worn out and disheveled, I was somewhat surprised to find out that my stay had boosted me into the next points bracket and I was now considered a VIP customer. Kathleen excitedly informed me that I’d been given a complimentary room upgrade, 15% off spa treatments and that a fruit bowl would be provided in my room each day – and who doesn’t love fruit?

Even to my sleep deprived mind, all of this was sounding great until she whipped out a camera and said “And we just need a picture”.

I froze.

“A picture for what…?”, I asked tentatively.

Kathleen smiled. “So that we can all recognise you and greet you properly” she said, like it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“Can’t I at least put some make up on first?” I asked weakly but she was having none of it, giving me the “but ma’am, you’re so beautiful” spiel. Knowing there was no point in resisting, I gave in.  Back straight against the beige papered hotel walls, it was like those terrible school photos you’re made to take as a kid that you know will undoubtedly show you at your exact worst. I didn’t even want to look at the finished product, preferring to say a polite goodbye and collapse in a rather inelegant heap in the chair for a power nap.

A couple of hours later after a quick power nap/gym session/shower & change, I reemerged looking remarkably more human and Anna-like than I had previously. This obviously showed because when I went downstairs to the lobby, no-one recognised me.

For a split second, I just thought it meant I’d been saved and that my picture hadn’t been circulated until I spotted Kathleen and, after waving hello, realised it took her a second to place me. Only when I was walking away did I hear the girl next to her ask who I was and a “Oh!” a few seconds after that when she twigged who I was.

Oh dear.

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